Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Deadpool's Completely Festive Movie Review Of The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013)

Muahaha… While you all thought I was just being lazy, I was actually holding off on releasing another review until Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Fesitvus/ZombieJesusDay/etc.! (… Okay, that’s a lie; I was actually just being lazy. Hey, YOU try working a mercenary job with no salary these days! Damn kids and your Steam sales…)

So on top of ALL those other movies we already saw this month, we have perhaps one of the most hyped right in front of our freaking little pupils, The Hunger Games: Catching Fire. Based off the second book in this irregularly popular series, the trilogy continues right where the end of the first film left off. I’m going to be completely honest with all y’allz; as a fan of the three books (HEREADSBOOKSZOMG), I did NOT care for the way the first story was depicted on screen. Not only did the movie take away every last sense of wonder and mystery that the first novel gave you , but their attempt to look like “the indie kid” with that damn shaky camera was just too much to stomach (Literally! I couldn’t keep that popcorn down for long folks!... Sorry again to the kid who was in front of me… He knows why… >_>).

Well I’m thrilled to report that this sequel fixed just about every annoying little complaint I had with the first film. For starters, NO MORE SHAKY SEIZURE-INDUCING CAMERA BITCHES! I think we can all agree it was just a bad idea the first time around and move on with our self-entitled little lives. Secondly, the mystery factor is more or less back again. Now obviously, when a book is written from the perspective of one character, you can’t usually expect the movie to follow the same pattern. While the second film doesn’t exactly do that either, it’s okay, because the things you see going on outside actually enhance the experience, rather than just rob you of any ounce of development like it did the first time around.

And plenty happens this time around. Just when you think you’re starting to get a grasp on things by about halfway through the movie, they slap you across the face at 180 degrees to show you that things are just getting started and that no one is ready for what’s coming. Gotta love that doom and gloom. Kids love the doom and gloom. Because it’s deep. Deep like them.

… So deep.

As usual, the actors and actresses were at their best, and we got some excellent newcomers thrown into the mix. Everyone plays their part like they were pretty much born for the role. This especially applies to parts like Effie, who should more or less be a Japanese anime character, and Finnick, who was so accurate to his book description, I’d almost argue that he existed in real life first and that Suzanne Collins simply wrote about him after!

I will also say that of the three mentioned books, this is actually my favorite of the three. After the first story, you had absolutely no idea what was going to really happen next, and that was totally rad. It added to that badass feeling of badass-ery when you finally did know what was coming and knew where to go from there. Even though I’m pissed that the third book (of EQUAL length to the other two) is being made into two separate movies, ala that annoying trend I’m now seeing among most Hollywood book-to-film projects, I’m still happily excited to see where the movies will go from here. But enough of that! It’s time for the part where I give the review score and say something witty to end this on.

9 Quarter Quell’s Out Of 10

If there’s one thing that seeing the success of these books/movies has taught me, it’s that in order to be a famous writer of today, you need to craft a story about a young female overcoming obstacles and fighting corruption. If you do this right, you will become a BILLIONARE. I kid you not. If you think I’m wrong, read up on another little series called Divergent, which is about to do the EXACT. SAME. THING. No offense to the Divergent series, but I think we can all see what’s going on there, as do I since I read the first book (HEREADANOTHERBOOKZOMGITSLIKEIDONTEVENKNOWYOUANYMORE). Merry ‘all those holidays I wrote down in the first paragraph’ everyone!

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